Distraction

Distraction

            It’s rampant in our society. We live in a colorful, noisy and often fragrant world that captures our attention. It is a planned attack on our senses. We have new diseases and medical professions to deal with the outbreak of distractions in the form of attention deficits. It seems somehow related to the outbreaks of autism, video games, multi-tasking and the growing need for pointless, tasteless information. The word Google itself boggles and distracts, while it represents an incredible source of value, especially money. The massive amount of trivia and spin doctors has cyberspace, book stores, educational outlets, waiting rooms, and my bookshelves filled with distractions. I myself am guilty of using clichéd, esoteric, urbane humor to distract.

            Distraction is addictive. It may be first cousin to procrastination (the disease of tomorrow), excuses (the only person who cares about excuses is the excuse-maker) and ‘whatever’ (the insidious disbelief in communicating what the “as is” is).

            

            I remember the movie The Point in the 1970’s. It is “an animated story of an unusual kingdom in which everything and everybody is pointed -- except for a young boy named Oblio. Despite his round head, Oblio has many friends. But an evil Count, jealous that Oblio is more popular than his own son, says that without a pointed head, Oblio is an outlaw. Along with his faithful dog Arrow, Oblio is exiled to the Pointless Forest. There, he has many fantastic experiences (including encounters with a three-headed man, giant bees, a tree in the leaf-selling business, and a good-humored old rock). From his adventures, Oblio learns that it is not at all necessary to be pointed to have a point in life.” (From IMDB.com)

         I am from that age that made outlaws heroes. It was an age and a movie that sensed that not everything needs a point. Yet in the forty years since the release of the movie, society has found points to such pointless activities as fun, stress freedom, meditating, random acts of kindness, often easing the constraints of the incantations of WIIFM (what’s in it for me). As often happens with wisdom, it gets subverted into its opposite. Or maybe the opposite exists and The Point just allowed distractions to grow, be acceptable and profitable then and run rampant.

         My point is: paying attention is our best investment, for only I can decide if there is a point or a distraction or a situation for paying attention.

         The challenge I love is to share  the lessons of paying attention.

Good Friday

A Good Friday 

          Speaking fearlessly is about questioning controversial topics.

         I wonder what’s good about a day the hero of the Christian world gets nailed to a cross.

         Our language keeps evolving verbs into strange multiple meanings. ‘Nailed’ can be slang for sex, being drunk, or clinching a sales presentation.

         With sex and religion in the same paragraph my attention is fully engaged. Roll away the stone, it’s Good Friday, so some pontification upon the state of Christianity may clear my slate on Jesus.

         Jesus first wandered into my consciousness when I found a little red Bible at age three. I showed it to Mom and she told me about God, Adam and Eve and their two sons, the first and only people. Then Mom asked “where did the girls who married the boys come from?” This question has fueled my evolution for six decades.

         The first hymn I learned in Baptist Bible School at age 6 was “♪Onward Christian soldiers marching onto war.” I wondered then and still do what Christians are doing marching to war when the message was Love?

         When John Lennon said the Beatles were more popular than Jesus, he was right in my world. When The Beatles sang “♪All you need is Love” there was no battle. 

         Jesus was the first long hair I ever saw. I had some confusion with Jesus and Santa Claus. They arrived to celebrate the same day; both had a naughty and nice thing going on. Both could do magic with presents. One had disciples, the other reindeer and elves. New information says they both were married to very supportive wives who worked with their husbands. I think it’s a tossup economically with Jesus and the Catholic Church having a head start monetarily, but Santa and Christmas presents now has the marketing momentum.

         When I learned meta programs, how to frame information and beliefs, I framed Jesus as metaphorical role model of present time, highest thought, divine connection, a creator of miracles with the faith to move mountains. He endured conscious suffering. He knew where and how to use his attention. He was a role model whose outcome, getting nailed was an odd ending for a great guy.

         What’s the lesson?

         Maybe it is about questioning legends?

         It is always about what we believe.

         Perhaps we are all metaphorically nailed into a dark cave of our own winter creations and as spring begins we need three days for resurrection and celebration.

         It all depends on how you frame it.

Who's Driving

Who’s Driving?

          From a very young age, in order to survive, we’re taught to believe certain things by our parents and caregivers. Whether these beliefs are true or not we may have forgotten to ask, or just assumed they were.

         These beliefs form the core of how we view life and everything that “comes into our world”. These beliefs act as filters, which both frame and control our every thought and perception. The vast majority (over 90%) of these filters are un-conscious, acting as both filters and imprints.

         What this means is that over 90% of the time, we’re simply unaware of why we do what we do. Rick Jarow, author of “Creating The Work You Love” says it well: “We may be driven, but we do not know who or what is driving us.”

         It is this question that has sent me to hundreds of workshops, read hundreds of books, written hundreds of essays and sermons to find out. I am a very curious fellow who wants to know what I know, what others know, and how to get the most out of the limited time available in life.

          Let’s look closely at this quote when it says: “but we do not know who or what is driving us.” Some may read the quote and think it’s admirable to be driven. Others look deeper and see the potential hidden reason for their pain and suffering.

         Have you ever wondered when life doesn’t go the way you want what’s really happening under the surface”? In other words, who or what’s doing the driving?

         I look to the concept of continuums to understand these situations and place the desire to know at the one end and who cares (whatever)at the other, and as long as I think in terms of continuums I feel movement, and movement does keep ones attention. I am enjoying the ride.

         Over the years there have been hundreds of books written with titles like...The Secret-You can have anything you want. As a general rule, these books urge us to see ourselves in a new light and thus generate within ourselves a personal magnet whereby the universe brings us new rewards and experiences. Great theory...and, to a degree, I buy it.

         In practice, though, we have beliefs, attitudes and habits that serve as substantial barriers to achieving these new levels.  How do we, for example, see ourselves as receivers of financial abundance when we have competing beliefs like "rich people are greedy, nasty and step on people to get all that wealth"?

         So who is driving? Are we in a car, bus, bicycle or are we walking? Is anyone else riding with me? What can I do?

         One-Take an inventory-I’ll gladly send you our Checking Inn inventory.

         Two-Get a mirror and take a good honest look at yourself and your day(s)-do it more than once. Let the mirror become your personal assistant.

         Three-Use your fearlessly speaking skills to ask trusted honest friends-“What do you see, feel or think when I walk into the room?” Thank them with “I can use that,” and gather insights and see who is driving. 

        It is amazing what others know about who is driving us.

Going Meta

Going Meta

            Not Mecca, or any location, but positioning yourself above your situation. Seeing a bigger picture, a new point of view using your own GPS (Great Paths to Success) to go beyond, separating from the situation and getting the sense to how it all fits together.

         Being Meta is a vision, a frozen moment in time, similar to those who have had out of body experiences. You see you doing you.

         “Wow, that’s me playing me.”   

         Being Meta means you can see the vision without judgment. Your role may be as an extra or as the star. It lasts as long as your attention can hold the space of NOW.

         Going Meta offers the benefit of detaching before reacting, or should reaction already occur seeing the outcome of reacting without judgment, excuses or blame, and see what happens with judgment, excuses and blame.

e. 

         How to get Meta?

         By being curious and finding the ‘that’s interesting’ space in you. Feeding your curiosity muscle and punching a ride on as many ways of seeing you as your attention can hold. 

         I go Meta not to miss the feel of it all, but to get a bigger view than my mind. I could be looking to see if I am clinging to the same old same, (SOS) and help break a ‘going nowhere loop’. Or is this loop one I want to use to see more specifics of this moment?

         What purpose does this action serve?

         Is this vision aligned with my higher purpose?

         Where is my attention?

         I love being Meta, judgment free, present with the mystery of the moment and evolving into being in the quiet, ease and grace of appreciation.

         Being Meta I am beginning to look and recognize certain energies, called by Quantum Physics as ‘attractors.’

         This is a revelation brewing for decades that life does not go in a limited sequential manner. 1,2,3,4, may actually go 1,4,2,8,5,7  even with the pattern of numbers happening simultaneously.

         The concept of time and cause and effect are limits created in that moment as an answer, when multiple forces are at work. 

         I am interested in finding attractors, and becoming an attractor. I have some clues.  Attractors are not static. They appear to be verbs, with power to create and empower change. They reflect or create values and lofty principles. I find they act like muses, the kind Elizabeth Gilbert talks about in Eat, Pray, Love. Here is her link at Ted Talk https://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_gilbert_on_genius?language=en

         Attractors speak with words and phrase like ‘you can’, ‘you may,’ ‘yes and’. These are statements and words that create choices and attract other attractors with synergy.

         Quantum Physicist is discovering attractors and how they influence life. Ancient wisdom and Fairy tales have been aware of the invisible but obvious influences of the magic of attractors. These energies have been called Angels, Sages, Avatars, and many more names. They were visited by mystics who have shared their experiences of the wisdom of ages and bringing passion, compassion, truth, courage, understanding and forgiveness. When we manifest those values we tap into and become attractors with each contact building our presence and value.

         Pay attention, attractors are all around us, use them. Become one.  

Conscience

Let your conscience be you guide.

         Within all of us are many voices, many reasons, emotions, sensations, choices and challenges. How to know which one is conscience?

         Conscience isn’t the loudest, doesn’t have an accent, sure isn’t pushy, or even assertive.

         Conscience isn’t concerned with being right or making anyone wrong.  

         Conscience resonates with feeling good. It doesn’t need press, (I’ve written for years and finally got around to acknowledging the wisdom of a childhood cartoon hero and his intent to do the right things.) but conscience lets me sleep easy at night, and may even add color, sound, music and messages to Mr. Morpheus directions in dreamland.

         Conscience speaks with respect for me and all I connect too.

         Conscience doesn’t  need editing. 

         Knowing conscience is there, available at each moment, that conscience is not something I have to exercise, update, upgrade, reload, just remember it is speaking in a still small voice with all our best interests at heart.

         Hearing conscience speak is a comfort.

         I wonder if it is an identity, a guardian angel, or a connection to higher center. I knew it existed before Pinocchio and Walt Disney crowned Jiminy Cricket- “Lord High Keeper of the Knowledge of Right and Wrong, Counselor in Moments of Temptation, and Guide along the Straight and Narrow Path."

         Conscience seems like one of the first things to go with politicians often unpopular with teens, and easily lost in the din of the high tech 2000’s. 

         Did Donald bankrupt his conscience? When I think Donald I think Duck is an appropriate verb.J

         Where is conscience in cyberspace?

         Conscience is a voice that needs recognition, a revival. It is not a religious movement to be aware of, but a podcast to listen for inner guidance. A voice that brings meaning to our methods, clarifies our course, helps align the new age and gives speakers the conviction and honesty to share core values.   

       

Be Gentle

Be Gentle 

When our desire surpasses our fear. 

         As many years as I wandered in the 'woo-woo' of life I only had one invisible angel speak to me. Almost forty years ago while living alone in St. Johns, Oregon an odor of a strange perfume was followed by a voice  "Be Gentle." That's all. It was a time of change  and I took the words to mean be gentle with your self. 

        There is a Gary Larson-The Far Side-cartoon showing two Martians hiding behind a rock. They set up a mirror on one side of the path in front of a rock, down which were walking a man and  woman. One Martian says to the other, "Let's see if it attacks it's own image."

                                          

          We may never meet an audience so judgmental as we are of ourself. Use Self-compassion-"Be Gentle" said the angel. Cultivate self friendship as the key to self-compassion:             Be your own best friend because everyone needs someone to be there for them, and wherever we go there we are. 

          Make the audience your best friend because as a speaker your purpose is to change the world by getting the audience to fall in love with themselves. 

         Be gentle with your self, you are precious. 

How to read the Audience

How to Read the Audience

Simplified Check List

         Preparation and simplicity are cures for the fear of public speaking. Here are 3 vital elements in your presentation-

         1-You

         2-Your message

         3-The audience.

         Who is your audience?

         Whether it is a keynote address, a sales presentation, or a inspiration/motivation speech do the homework to prepare for success.

      Send out a Pre-presentation Questionnaire:

       1-What are the demographics of the audience?

         2-What are their current challenges?

         3-What are the new trends or changes in their life or industry?

      Day of presentation:

      1-Be early meet and greet. Attempt to shake hands with everyone.

        2-Introduce yourself and become friends to all-“Hi I’m Gary C Smith I am your speaker. I’ll be speaking on-your topic-with excitment.

        3-Check room temperature-microphone, lights, exits and know where the restrooms are.

       Introduction:

       1-Have your Speaker’s intro delivered well ahead of time to introducer or emcee. The introduction shares your credibility and experience.

       2-Use Self-Humor. Look dashing and debonair.

       3-Be relevant from the beginning. You are on purpose, the expert. Let them know how this message will impact them.

        Presentation:

        1-Your Attention out on the Audience!

        2-Make eye contact. One idea one person.

        3-Catch the audience cues. Be aware of an Elephant in the room.

         Post presentation:

         1-Use a ‘call backs’ asking for the audience to recap.

         2- Q & A-Remember to repeat the question.

         3-Follow up with a Thank You. 

Keep it simple as 1-2-3. 

Thinking is a Learned Skill

                Thinking is a learned skill.

Speaking fearlessly clear thought is key.

A man is talking to God. “God, how long is a million years?”

God answers, “To me, it’s about a minute.”

“God, how much is a million dollars?”

“To me, it’s a penny.”

“God, may I have a penny?”

“Wait a minute.

You had to think to make cents out of the story. J

Thinking requires connecting ideas, segues. 

It requires memory & organization which means visualization, separating this from that.

IT requires comparison and scale which brings in the concept of continuums.

Thinking requires multiple points of view (POV)

Thinking requires the EGO to get out of the way so that

         You can make a mistake

                  You don’t have to be right

                           You go past ‘I already know that.’

Mathematics with numbers, computation skills, equations, permutations, calculations are the reason Algebra exists to teach the basics of thinking. The How.

The Why of thinking is contained in this thought from Martha Heyman  

“Only human beings have the time (and capacity) to ponder, to find out where they came from, to imagine how it feels to be someone else, to envision the whole and their place in it, to wonder what they are suppose to do with their large brains and their leisure time.”

How to exercise your thinking muscle:

         Take risks

                  Make decisions

                           Change POV

                                    Ask questions

                                             Be deliberate

                                                      Have a place to think

                                                               Have a time to think

                                                                        Have a purpose to learn the skill

         Celebrate and share your original thought.

March Forth and Show Up.

          This is a special day when the Julian calendar sends a message. This message was originally written on March Forth 2004, an election day with banners being displayed that encouraged us to “Stand Up and Be Counted.” That day PBS played a musical tribute to songwriters of the 20^th century and I loved the big band music singing

♪‘Ya gotta accent the positive,

latch on to the affirmative.

Don’t mess with Mr. In-between.”♪ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z45EB4TiYz4

         Sung by Bette Midler & Bing Crosby

         I funnel these communications through the idea “The meaning of life is the meaning you give life.” As a speaker  March Forth and Show up with presence that has meaning.

         Show up where?

         March Forth where?

         Everywhere.!

         Take a day with a built-in message, and turn up the volume to show up with more kindness, more presence, more fun, more compassion, more creativity.

         Today I am handling some incompletes.  I am checking my own messages and securing that I am in clarity with what I am doing and Marching Forth with a clear message, my banner “Paying Attention is My Best Investment.”

         Well it’s March.

         March is our first verb month. May is the next verb month.

         Today is March forth, an admonition from the ages to step forward & make your self known.  Deliberately March forth and see what happens.         Carry your banner

         March forth with a plan to be felt and feel what happens.

         March forth being present, and see what else shows up.

         March is magical with the equinox, the Ides and a full 31 days to March.

         What’s March mean to you?  Time to come out of hibernation.

         It’s time to Spring soon.